Monday, June 11, 2007

The Dolphin Stress Test

Above is a picture of two dolphins.

If you can see both dolphins, your stress level is within the acceptable range.

If you see anything other than two dolphins, your stress level is too high and you need to stay home and rest....and order an emergency supply of IMMAT bracelets so that you can return to normal functioning.

An IMMAT Educational Series: Know Your State Motto

Alabama: Hell Yes, We Have Electricity.
Alaska: 11,623 Eskimos Can't Be Wrong!
Arizona: Yes, But It's A Dry Heat.
Arkansas: Lituracy Ain't Everythang.
California: By 30, Our Women Have More Plastic Than Your Honda.
Colorado: If You Don't Ski, Don't Bother.
Connecticut: Like Massachusetts , only smaller
Delaware: We Really Do Like The Chemicals In Our Water.
Florida: Ask Us About Our Grandkids And Our Voting Skills.
Georgia: We Put The Fun In Fundamentalist Extremism.
Hawaii: Haka Tiki Mou Sha'ami Leeki Toru (Death To Mainland Scum, Leave Your Money)
Idaho: More Than Just Potatoes...Well, Okay, We're Not, But the Potatoes Sure Are Real Good
Illinois: Please, Don't Pronounce the "S"
Indiana: 2 Billion Years Tidal Wave Free
Iowa: We Do Amazing Things With Corn
Kansas: First Of The Rectangle States
Kentucky: Five Million People; Fifteen Last Names
Louisiana: We're Not ALL Drunk Cajun Wackos, But That's Our Tourism Campaign.
Maine: We're Really Cold, But We Have Cheap Lobster
Maryland: If You Can Dream It, We Can Tax It
Massachusetts: Our Taxes Are Lower Than Sweden 's And Our Senators Are More Corrupt
Michigan: First Line Of Defense From The Canadians
Minnesota: 10,000 Lakes... And 10 Zillion Mosquitoes
Mississippi: Come Visit and Feel Better About Your Own State
Missouri: Your Federal Flood Relief Tax Dollars At Work
Montana: Land Of The Big Sky, The Unabomber, Right-wing Crazies, and Honest Elections!
Nebraska: Ask About Our State Motto Contest
Nevada: Hookers and Poker!
New Hampshire: Go Away And Leave Us Alone
New Jersey: You Want A ##$%##! Motto?I Got Yer ##$%##! Motto Right here!
New Mexico: Lizards Make Excellent Pets
New York: You Have The Right To Remain Silent, You Have The Right To An Attorney...And No Right To Self Defense!
North Carolina: Tobacco Is A Vegetable.
North Dakota: We Really Are One Of The 50 States!
Ohio: At Least We're Not Michigan
Oklahoma: Like The Play, But No Singing
Oregon: Spotted Owl.. It's What's For Dinner
Pennsylvania: Cook With Coal
Rhode Island: We're Not REALLY An Island
South Carolina: Remember The Civil War?Well, We Didn't Actually Surrender Yet
South Dakota: Closer Than North Dakota
Tennessee: Home of the Al Gore Invention Museum .
Texas: Se Hable Ingles
Utah: Our Jesus Is Better Than Your Jesus
Vermont: Too liberal for the Kennedys
Virginia: Who Says Government Stiffs And Slackjaw Yokels Don't Mix?
Washington: Our Governor can out-fraud your Governor!
West Virginia: One Big Happy Family...Really!
Wisconsin: Come Cut the Cheese!
Wyoming: Where Men Are Men... And The Sheep Are Scared!
The District of Columbia: The Work-Free Drug Place!